Valentine’s Day

Posted February 14th, 2002 by Deepa and filed in Uncategorized
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Aparna mailed me sking the origin of the Valentine Day celeberations And i was bored and so here goes!

Aao bachon tumhe sunaaye kissa valentine ki…

Long Long ago there lived a young man…He was not intelligent ..he was not smart…he was not rich ….he was not handsome…Do I hear you say “what a boring hero??” . Yes my dears he was  boring…But unfortunately he is the hero of our tale….so we have to bear with him

Now this young man lived in a small town in ancient Greece. Now we know that people in ancient Greece were very loving people….very very loving…they loved everybody …and they loved passionately and they loved intimately.. Greece at that time was a very modern and “hep” place to be!

But consider our poor young man …did I mention his name before..oh well..ok.. his name was Valentus. Now Valentus found it very difficult to live in that town …Just think of it a man of his capabilities living with all those Greek Gods…Valentus hated these Greek Gods in front of whom all women swooned…He did not have a single girlfriend….. nobody to sing love songs for him…nobody to dance by his side ….well nobody! And he was jealous…oh mighty jealous! So he decided he has to do something to attract girls towards him….

Well all characters have atleast one talent and so did out Valentus .He could hum. What? Well I mean exactly that he could hum. So he hit upon a plan..Every evening after tea….( that was the peak romance time in Ancient Greece) our hero would stand near the house of a young damsel and start humming….Charmed by the sound the young girl would come tripping out…Valentus thought then it would be easy to lead the girl to his garden then! But alas for Valentus ,the moment the girl stepped out she would catch sight of one of the Greek Gods strolling about the place and go off with him to dance around trees( yes Yes there were lot of trees in Greece then!!)

And poor Valentus stood there ..his nice cheerful hum changing to a sad gloomy tune!

And so it went on a for a few more years ….and poor Valentus was alone on every holiday ….every celebration..Old ladies clicked their tounges at him and said “my dear Valentus you have to do something”,the young men mocked him and the young girls giggled at him and the old men ignored him ..Small children tormented him in the way only small children call do…they called him Valentus the ASS!

Sad and disappointed Valentus left Greece and decided to travel far far away! He first went north but he did not have any warm clothes ( he had left Greece in a hurry) so turned away by the time he reached near the place we now know as Norway….then he turned back and statrted traveling south….but after he traveled south for some time he saw the big Atlantic Ocean and was stuck, He was not adventurous enough to build a boat ,so he decided to travel east…

Seven years and seventy days did he travel …amidst civilization, jungles and ruins ….and then he reached the place known as the “mystical EAST”. He finally reached the outskirts of a city …and there he saw another young man sitting outside a garden hiding behind a tree . this other young man peeked at something from time to time ,evidently decided it was not worth his while to ocme out and then his behind the tree again…Our young man went near the other young man from the East and peered to see what he was looking at….

And guess what he saw,…there was a bevy of beauties sitting beneath a tree singing songs,picking roses …Aha said young Valentus ….here is another young man to whom no girls are attracted….He went towards the young man and said “My friend ,I who come from Greece can understand your pain…I know how terrible it is when no girls looks at you…I emphathise my friend I do”

The youth from the east was startled…He glanced back at the sylvan setting to check whether any of those damsels had seen him peeping …and then took Valentus by his arm and rushed him away…

“No No you are mistaken “, he said,” I am hiding for another reason”

What? ,Cried young Valentus …Why are you hiding from them then …you should be singing and dancing along with them?

“Ha!!”.So you think ..I have a different problem…I need privacy …I need some time for myself….All these girls are crazy about me …each time theu se me they swarm about me ..I am tired of them…

But why you are so lucky …I came away from Greece because I couldn’t bear the taunts of all the people there….but why do you want to escape?asked Valentus

May be I can help you….I will transer my powers to you …atleast half my powers and then all the girls will be attracted to you and then I can remain in peace….

Powers?? What powers do you have

O youth from Greece “I know all the tricks of love “ I can impart the powers to you…

So saying Kama taught Valentus the Kamasutra!!

Yipppeee cried Valentus Now I can dance around trees too ….

Whats that? Dance around a tree…? Enquired kama

Well that’s what all the ppl in Greece do whe they fall in love..They find a particular tree and dance around it!!

Sounds fun said Kama …we should try it tooo here in India!!

Valentus went back to Greece and became the worlds first professional gigolo and in honor of his asinine behaviour (valentus asinine ) February 14 ( the day he stepped foot into Greece again ) was celebrated as Lovers day!! (Valentineasinine day—shortened to Valentine dAY!!)

And thus people in India started to dance around trees!!

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